Life in a London Flat #5 - Bookshelves
I love books; I can't live without them. We have been successful at simplifying many of our possessions, but books are impossible to part with.
Sometimes I think we're going sink under the weight of all the books in our London flat. I worry that, as we buy more books and pile them into the bookshelf, we'll have to build a buttress outside to hold both the floor and the wall up. Otherwise we might collapse into our neighbour's flat below.
When I look at our bookshelf, each book tells a story. Not just the story within its pages, but also the story of who I was and what I was thinking the moment I read it. A bookshelf is like an autobiography. When I visit someone's house, I love taking a peek at their bookshelves, as I can tell so much about their interests and habits by looking at the titles on the spines. Cookbooks. Travel books. Novels. Poetry. Art books. They all reveal aspects of our characters.
Books allow us to enter imaginatively into someone else's life. And when we do that, we learn to sympathize with other people. But the real surprise is that we also learn truths about ourselves, about our own lives, that somehow we hadn't been able to see before.
So, tip #5 for
Life in a London flat
is: proudly display your books, they are part of who you are (and related... tip #5.1 is hide your TV... ours is behind the hinged panel below the shelves).
I don't ascribe to the trends stating that we should recover our books in neutral dust-jackets, or arrange them by size or colour so the bookshelves look like rainbows. Having been a librarian's assistant in a past life (nerd alert!), I try to arrange my books alphabetically and in genres, such as fiction, non-fiction, poetry, etc. Our books are bright and colourful, and add an injection of personality into our small, serene little flat.
Our built-in bookshelf was built by the amazing
, who worked as a boat builder in Holland before moving to London and starting his cabinetry business. He works with navy-style attention to detail and precision.
So many thoughts. So many ideas. So many memories. So many ways our minds have been challenged and broadened.
So here's a question: do your bookshelves tell your story?
"A little library, growing every year,
is an honourable part of a man's history.
It is a man's {and woman's} duty to have books."
Henry Ward Beecher
"When you reread a classic,
you do not see more in the book than you did before;
you see more in yourself than there was before."
Clifton Fadiman
Related posts
More glimpses of life in a London flat
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A birthday self-portrait
Instead of sharing my daily drawings (of which there were few) this week. I thought I'd share my annual birthday self portrait.
Several years ago I started a tradition of drawing a self portrait on or around my birthday. It was inspired by Rembrandt, who painted many expressive and honest self-portraits throughout his life-time. The self portraits track his emotional, physical and creative maturation.
I'm not Rembrandt, and I don't paint in oils; even so, each year I'm challenging myself to draw or paint something to represent the moment, the week, the day, that I grew one year older.
This year's drawing is very small, just a simple pencil sketch in my tiny moleskine sketchbook. Did I catch my likeness? To be honest, I think the sketch was perfect about 3 minutes before I put my pencil down. I added a few too many strokes, and lost some of the intensity. However, I think it perfectly captures my current mood of introspection.
Today isn't my birthday. However, on the day, I spent a lot of time reflecting on what has happened in the past year and what I hope will come to fruition in the next year.
Do you have any birthday traditions?
Feeling inspired? Please share, tweet, pin or favourite!
Go Back in Time...
Adventures in... Salzburg
While we were in Austria I was able to take few hours off from childcare and spend the day wandering around Salzburg. The cold, blustery wind stung my cheeks, but nothing would dampen my enthusiasm for this small, picturesque little city.
I wandered the streets, got lost, found myself again, and admired the sorbet-coloured baroque buildings: pistachio, strawberry, raspberry, vanilla. Distances aren't large in the old part of the city, but the streets are arranged like a labyrinth, so getting anywhere takes time and a keen sense of direction.
The sun shone brilliantly, making the gorgeous city sparkle. And, in sheltered corners, it was just warm enough to loosen my scarf and open my jacket while sitting on a park bench. At noon I pulled out the lunch I had packed from the hotel's breakfast buffet: a small brown roll filled with holey swiss cheese, and ate while basking in a warm sunbeam.
The old part of the city is called the cathedral district because there is a huge church on practically every street corner. On the hour, every hour, the various church bells chimed in unison, creating a reverberation of sound across the city.
Mozart
Salzburg is famous for being the birthplace of Mozart. He was born in a narrow yellow house, on a narrow little street, in the old part of the city, and he was baptized the day after his birth in the cathedral.
I decided not to go into the house, which has been turned into a museum, but rather honoured my love of Mozart by humming my favourite parts of his compositions while I wended my way up and down the cobbled the streets of the city.
As I walked past the concert hall, near the castle, I saw a glint of gold flashing from a high window. When I looked more closely I saw that it was someone practicing the French horn; he was aiming the flared bell of the instrument at the window so that all the passing traffic could hear the jaunty rising phrases of a Mozart horn concerto. The theme floated into the cold spring air and echoed between the ancient buildings.
Salzburg makes the most of their "Mozart" connection, and have even invented a chocolate truffle named after him. It is a sphere made of concentric layers of pistachio marzipan, nougat and chocolate. Both delicious and addictive.
{Yum!}
The castle
Salzburg actually means "Salt Fortress" in German. Salt was mined in the mountains nearby and, in the middle ages, barges carrying salt up the Salzach river had to pay a toll in Salzburg. The castle, perched high on the hill above the old town, called the Festung Hohensalzburg, was started in 1077, and it was hugely expanded in the following centuries.
I decided to walk the narrow, precipitous path to the toll gate rather than take the funicular, because I wanted to tread those same stones that medieval travellers might have trodden on. The climb was hot and exhausting work, and I couldn't help myself from breathlessly singing the German hymn. "Eine feste Burg ist unser Gott." (A mighty fortress is our God).
The medieval genius of the castle was astounding. For, had any invader successfully breached the steep castle walls (or made the climb without keeling over from exhaustion), they would have found themselves getting deeply lost in the spiral-shaped labyrinth of paths and ramparts that guarded the archbishops fortress in the centre. Even I, with my tourist map, got completely confused, and failed to find the same footpath that had led me in. I ended up taking the funicular down to save energy and time.
The views from the top of the castle walls was astounding. I could see the entire town of Salzburg laid out below me like a miniature city, and the ring of snowy peaked Alps in the distance.
{The Castle}
{The Cathedral reflected in the castle windows}
{A seagull flying above the Salzach river}
The Language
Just for the fun of it, I challenged myself to only speak German for the day.
It's easy to get the feeling that you know a language when you can order a cup of coffee, and they don't look at you askance, or ask for basic directions, and not make a fool of yourself. So, I considered my foray into the resurrection my German to be a success. At least I could understand and communicate. (the former far better than the latter).
Sometimes I find it astonishing that anyone can understand my German at all! However, when it comes to holding more involved conversions, my language skills are sorely lacking.
(Having said that, Austrians are wonderfully polite and friendly people, and most know English very well.)
Because I'm a nerd...
... I passed the long train journey reading Helen McInnes's book "The Salzburg Connection," which is a cold war spy novel set in Salzburg and Zurich.
It is a fast paced, if slightly dated novel, filled with stereotypical intrigues. The amateur sleuth gets caught up in a mystery that's over his head, he meets CIA agents, an impossibly beautiful and seemingly-vulnerable femme-fatal, and acquires a smart, sassy (and also beautiful) sidekick. Of course, good prevails and the guy gets the gal. Woven through the plot are McInnes's atmospheric descriptions of Salzburg and the Austrian mountains and lakes nearby.
Do you want more armchair adventures?
A weekend in Windhoek, Namibia
Adventures in Rome and Tuscany
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Embrace 2015 - February
Two months down, ten more to go. The new year has both flown by, and crawled at a snail's pace. I no longer measure my days with minutes and seconds, but with nap times: morning nap, noon nap, afternoon nap, evening nap.
My word for this year is EMBRACE, and I'm endeavouring to
embrace
this year's changes (both joyful and difficult). Last year my word was BUILD, and by the end of the year I had completely forgotten about it. So, this year I'm planning to do review posts at the end of each month to assess how this year's word is changing my life and my mindset.
FEBRUARY
My mom stayed with us for the first three months of Little M's life and left at the end of January. February has been a month of adjusting to our new daily rhythms as a family of three. We've been asking ourselves all sorts of exploratory questions in order to improve our quality of life. Some changes involve big decisions, others are more like leaning gently in a new direction. Even the smallest adjustment in rhythm can make huge ripple effects for the rest of the day.
Part of this effort to embrace my new lifestyle (with baby) is to continue doing my small daily sketches. Some days it's easy and inspiring, other days I struggle to find the time or figure out what I want to draw, and sometimes, I don't draw at all. Even on the omission days, because I had the option of drawing but
chose
not to, I feel like I have a little more agency in my life.
And, I'm becoming an expert at embracing my teeny, tiny daughter. That's the easy part!
MARCH
What does March have in store for us? At the moment I'm not sure that I can really make extended plans beyond my daily to-do lists. The month definitely holds a birthday, so I need to embrace turning another year older!
And, now that Little M has crossed the four month mark, we're going to try embracing solids (or rather, mush). Won't that be an adventure for her little taste-buds!
Did you choose a word for 2015? Are you noticing any shifts in consciousness from it?
What victories are you celebrating this month?
Related Posts
Weekly drawings: week 9
{The tower of St. Hippolyte's Church}
We have spent the week in Zell am See, Austria, where my husband snowboarded and I relaxed with Little M and filled my sketchbook with Alpine views.
I packed a minimalistic art kit: a tiny moleskine sketchbook, a few pens, pencils and brushes, and a small palette of watercolour paint. I felt a bit confined by the small selection of supplies, but that's not a necessarily a bad thing when it comes to art. Sometimes limiting the options forces one to solve problems more creatively.
I'm planning to do two travel posts in the next week to highlight the beauties of Zell am See and Salzburg. But, for now, I'll just share my little sketches.
{The mountains}
{A 16th century building on the town square}
{Experimenting with watercolour techniques}
{The Festung Hohensalzburg castle in Salzburg, started in 1077}
Related Posts
Weekly Drawings: Week 8
{This picture expresses everything...}
This was the first week when, no matter now much I wanted to, I couldn't keep up with my resolution to draw every day.
You know what? That's ok.
I'll start again tonight, and keep going with my 365 drawing resolution. If, by the end of the year, there are 350 (or less) instead of 365, it doesn't really matter. What matters is that the resolution gives me a reason to sharpen my pencils and open my ink pots.
So here are 4 drawings for this week. That's still over half the days, so I think I'll consider it a success. (After all, the most important thing is that we're gentle with ourselves...)
I take all the photos with my iphone4 (geriatric, I know), and the pictures always look so crisp and light on my phone screen, but when I upload them here they appear blurry and dark. I wonder why?
And... we're off to the Austrian Alps tomorrow! I'm sure my sketchbook will be filled with mountains and skiers/snowboarders.
You can follow along in real time on my
or Instagram. ( @janeheinrichs )
Currently....
{Happy Valentines, belatedly!}
Reading //
I've just started the unabridged journals of Sylvia Plath. So far, she is struggling through her studies at Smith and having various rocky relationships with boys. All the entries are written in her clear, strong, eloquent voice.
Watching //
Rubbish reality TV, which makes me feel terribly guilty. By the time 5pm rolls around, I'm exhausted and out of ways to keep Little M entertained. So, we plonk down on the couch together and watch Dinner Date and the Real Housewives (of wherever...).
Thinking about //
What do do for Lent. One year I started to keep a gratitude journal, and wrote down 5 things I was thankful for each evening. I'm thinking of doing that again this year, only hopefully I'll persevere for all 40 days this time!
Anticipating //
Our trip to Austria, and my first ever time in the Alps in winter. I won't ski, as I'm not in that frame of mind, but I'll sit by the fire, drink hot chocolate, and enjoy the scenery.
Grateful for //
The fluffy duvet that I'm curled under right now. There's nothing better than high quality bedding. (And also, all your wonderfully insightful and supportive comments recently. I haven't gotten a chance to respond to all of you, but your kind words mean so much to me.)
Noticing //
That I am writing a lot of lists. Supplies to pack for the trip. Things to buy in our next grocery order. Ways to make life easier. Lists have the power to solve all problems.
Working on //
Writing a story for my own enjoyment. This one has no deadline, and as of yet, no readers. It's so wonderful to steal an hour (during naptime) and escape into this fantastical, imaginary world. Maybe someday it will be finished. Maybe.
Knowing //
That somehow, everything will be ok.
What are you up to currently?
Why I'm doing daily drawings
{All photos taken with my iphone4}
I'm not just doing daily drawings for the sake of a fun challenge; they are an essential part of my new existence as a mother.
Just before Christmas I was diagnosed with post-natal depression. I felt like I couldn't recognize myself in my new role. I went to my GP and was referred to a therapist. The options seemed to be weekly therapy (which wasn't possible without childcare) or antidepressants. I wasn't sure what I was feeling was acute or chronic enough to need medication, so I decided I needed to construct my own method for recovery. (Note: Had I thought what I was experiencing was severe enough, I would have accepted medication without question).
Daily drawings were my answer to the problem.
So far I've managed to draw every day this year but one (when I was just too exhausted to lift a pencil). Each small drawing is like a shot of creative happiness into my veins.
This practise is, quite literally, art therapy.
Do you have any creative endeavours that lift your spirits? What are they? I'd love to know.
How and why to keep a reading or book journal
When I was a teenager I discovered an old notebook of my grandmother's in which she had written down the title of every book she had read as a teenager in her gorgeous, florid handwriting.
Seeing her notebook inspired me, and shortly afterwards I bought a small notebook from our local dollar store and started keeping a reading journal of my own. I have recorded 715 books that I read for pleasure since October 30, 1999 (which is weird, as I just realized that my daughter was born exactly 15 years later!).
I didn't realize when I started how much that little reading journal would influence my life. It has become a bibliography or road map tracking my personality, my worries, my likes, my dislikes and my fascinations.
Why you should keep a reading journal:
1. To remember what you've read.
Sometimes I'll remember a story I read, but won't remember the title. Or I'll want to recommend a book that I loved three years ago... It's handy to be able to open my notebook, flip to the relevant page, and find the title and author.
2. To track your changing personality and reading taste.
Certain books speak to us at certain times in our lives. When I look back at the books I was reading a year ago, three years ago or 10 years ago I can see exactly who I was at that time and how those books nourished my personal quests.
3. To keep track of how much you've read.
If you're like me, you are a competitive reader. Each year I want to read more than the year before. The goal isn't always more books, but to read with more discernment. One year I read all of Shakespeare (except for the history plays). Other years I have had other challenges for myself. Keeping a reading journal keeps me accountable for my reading goals.
4. To record your impressions of a book.
My reading journal started out as a simple bibliography (Title, Author, Date Read), and hasn't expanded beyond that. However, I also keep a "Commonplace Book" where I collect quotes and passages that inspire me. This is like an extension of my reading journal.
5. It makes you a better reader and a better writer.
When you keep a book journal you are practising conscientious reading. You're reading with purpose, and giving focused attention to something invariably makes you better at it.
How to keep a reading journal:
1. Selecting a container.
The decision here is digital vs paper. When I started the digital world wasn't nearly as advanced as it is now. I bought a little notebook from our local dollar store and started recording the books as simple bibliography entries. As that's how I started, I don't think I'm going to change my system. You could get a slightly larger notebook and include your favourite quotes, if you wanted.
I know that Moleskine does a special reading journal notebook, which might be a nice option.
If you want to go digital, you could open a word document, or even use one of the reading log websites such as goodreads or librarything. The thing with goodreads that frustrated me is that you can't record books twice, which means you can never record when you've re-read a book. (My husband always teases me about how often I re-read books.)
2. Decide how much or how little you want to record.
This is completely up to you. Do you want to write a book review and collect quotes for each book? Or do you simply want to record the title, author and date you read it? Those three entries are the absolute minimum. You could also record how you acquired the book or who recommended it to you (bookstore, library, borrowed from friend, found on the train seat, etc). And you could have a system for rating the book. I usually put a small dot beside titles I really enjoyed.
If you do decide to copy quotes, make sure you write down the page numbers for each one, or you'll never be able to find the original again (I've learned from my mistakes).
3. Number the books.
Your first entry will be # 1. Then number each subsequent entry so that you can keep track of how many books you've read since you started. I've read 715 books for pleasure since Oct, 1999. I didn't include the innumerable books I had to read for academic papers and research, as all those books would have been recorded in the various research bibliographies appended to my essays and dissertations.
4. Record the book when you've finished it.
If you don't, you'll lose track.
5. Keep a page or two at the back to record books you want to read.
Whenever someone recommends a book, or I read a book review that sounds interesting, I write the title of the book down in the last pages of my reading journal. That way I'm never stuck for something to read when I have no books on my bedside table.
Have you every kept a reading journal? Do you have any tips?
This week's daily drawings
Are you Happy Right Now?
How happy are you right now? In this moment?
Take a deep breath. Close your eyes. Then open them and look around. Really take it all in.
Are you reading this on your laptop, sitting on your couch and sipping a cup of something? Or are you hunched over your cell phone on a bus, shoulders supporting your head (and all your worries)?
There are times when we feel like we have things more or less figured out: we have a daily routine, we're content, and we feel like we can handle whatever life throws us. Other times life can feel difficult, overwhelming and confusing.
In those moments, do you know what really makes you happy? When it comes to an awareness about the little, specific things that bring a smile to our faces and contentment to our hearts we often draw a blank.
Can you list a few things that trigger a feeling of delight in your daily life?
I'll be honest: life right now has knocked me sideways. (Some of you may have already figured that out by reading between the lines). Motherhood, as amazing as it is, is a huge adjustment, and I've never been one to enjoy change. I feel like I've forgotten what makes me happy in the storm of trying to cope with day to day challenges.
So, I've decided to approach life with the spirit of a detective to figure out what's missing. It's difficult to experience happiness when we're not able to savour small moments or be aware of our surroundings.
We need to curate the happiness in our lives like a museum director.
So, in this quest I've discovered that I love:
Keeping a journal
Shoes (this surprised me, as I'm not much of a fashionista)
Sipping a glass of wine after dinner
Flowers on my coffee table (currently I have a blushing sunrise of roses and tulips)
Red polish on my toenails
Drawing, anything, every day (watch my facebook or instagram to keep up with those)
Reading (Books, blogs, magazines....)
Living in London
Poetry (my local library doesn't even have one poetry book aside from Shakespeare... so I need to go on a hunt)
Organizing
Ballet (watching; dancing)
Yoga (I now do my sun salutations with Little M watching with amusement in her bouncy chair)
Photography
Lattes
Snow (it snowed in London this week!)
Beautiful artwork hanging on our walls (we're starting to collect South African artists)
Hearing church bells pealing in Sunday morning
Plus more
(I'm still investigating, I'll keep you posted)
What do you love? Can you make a list of small things that bring a smile to your face? Maybe it's listening to your favourite album, or watching the sunset over the rooftops, or selecting the perfect croissant from your local bakery each morning... Get creative, put on your Sherlock cap and get thinking.
We should all investigate what our personal preferences are so that we can recognize and embrace moments of happiness that our unique to us.
Now... take another deep breath. And try to find one thing to do today that will fill you with child-like joy.
Bon courage!
Valentines printables! and new daily routines
{PDF printable Valentine available
}
Today is a quiet day. The snow is muffling the busy sounds of the city. All I can hear are the bewildered birds chirping on the pollarded trunks of the plane tree across the street.
Baby is sleeping too, for which I am very grateful.
A few years ago I remember reading a book (touted by Oprah) called Simple Steps. The basic premise was one would add 4 new habits each week, for several weeks (say 12, maybe). I remember two of the habits for the first week were drinking water and cleaning out one drawer or cupboard. This book has stuck in my mind, because I feel like I need to make similar small, daily/weekly/monthly steps towards building a new healthy routine.
Despite all my searching, I can't find that book anywhere now. It's almost like I imagined it, and it never existed at all. (It had a daisy on the cover, so if you know of it, please let me know where to find a copy!)
This week my simple steps are: drinking water, doing yoga (or a few ballet barre exercises) each morning, drawing each day and posting the sketches to instagram and facebook, and making a to-do list each evening (which I try to adhere to the next day).
What are your small daily routines that keep you sane and on track?
On my list today was to write a blog post...
So here we go...
February is the month of love, and I thought I'd share these valentines printables I designed a year ago.
I'd love to design a few more printables to post in my etsy shop this year. What types of things would you like? A few ideas I had were: perpetual calendars, recipe cards, party invites, thank-you cards, gift tags....
do any of you fabulous readers have any other suggestions?
A Drawing a Day update #2
I had intended to write a post for my usual Wednesday blog slot, but this week carried me away in a tidal wave of diapers, soothers, and unfolded laundry.
It's not that time is rushing, because it isn't. In fact, I sometimes feel like time has never passed so slowly since Little M was born. Each second seems new and strange, and something to adjust to. I'm grateful for the apparent change in pace, for I can savour each delightful moment in its fullness (both length and depth, for time is not just linear).
And, when I can, I sketch.
In time, I want to focus on writing as well. And I was thinking of writing a series of posts on journalling.
Would that be of interest to anyone?
Follow the growing sketchbook on
or
.
A Drawing a Day
As you might expect, adjusting to life with a newborn hasn't been easy. Amidst all the joyful cooing and smiles, there are teary meltdowns and wakeful nights. At first I thought I would never be able to draw or write again. But as Little M grows, week by week, I'm finding that we're feeling more comfortable with each other and our new routines.
As an effort to nourish all the creative facets of my soul, I'm trying to draw something every day. Even the smallest sketch, or the action of picking up my pencil, makes me feel more whole.
I've been posting each tiny sketch on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter and the words of encouragement from all my followers are giving me the courage to continue. If I can... if I'm brave enough... I want to challenge myself to post a drawing every day this year.
Do you think I can?
Looking back on 2014 - and my word for 2015
This is the time of year when the world is full of actionable plans (seven steps to a healthier body, five ways to be happy, 3 secrets to conquering the world... you know what I mean) and I found myself wondering if any of these well-laid plans ever come to fruition. Can we actually shape our futures by following lists? When you look back on the year, did any of last year's resolutions come true? And if not, what else happened? Probably something more wonderful than you could have conceived on that dark, midwinter's night a year ago.
My dad used to say, "When you make plans, God laughs." It isn't malicious laughter, though, it's joyful laughter, because God's plans for us far exceed our own limited imaginations. Our little lists and goals can never encompass all that is meant for us. At least I choose to believe that.
Last year I chose the word "
build
" as my guiding word for the year. I intended to build my career, my relationships, my homes... never in a million years would I have imagined that I would actually spend the majority of the year
building
my daughter in utero.
Words are powerful things, they can change who we are.
I've pondered my word for 2015, and I'm proceeding cautiously. At the moment "
embrace
" seems to be fitting for my situation. I want to embrace motherhood, embrace my new life in London, and embrace new routines for my studio practice; in short, I want to embrace all the wonderful, new possibilities. But is embrace the right word? What other meanings or applications am I overlooking that might surprise me in a few months' time?
There's the big structure for the year, and then there are the small goals that knit the days together: knit, purl, drop a stitch... clickity-clack, pull some more yarn. These little rhythms are what give our days structure, they are the warp and weft that catch the minutes. Some of my small goals are: to drink more water, to do sun salutation yoga sequences daily, to write (and write and write), to draw every day for my own amusement (or my own amazement, as an elderly friend once remarked), to read, and to kiss my little girl's cheeks at every opportunity.
Are you choosing a word for the New Year? And, what are a few of your small goals? Please share it in the comments below!
2014 by the numbers
Number of books published: 1
Number of illustrated books completed: 3 (2 are coming out next year)
Number of flights: innumerable
Number of cities visited: 5 (Cape Town, London, Winnipeg, Amsterdam, Delft)
Number of babies born: 1
Number of books read: 39 (My goal is always 52, one for each week, but this year I faltered)
Number of diapers changed: don't even ask....!
Also! Start off the New Year by refreshing your social media streams... I'm trying to post a sketch a day on
,
, and
. Make sure you follow along and feel free to leave comments and suggestions!
Life in A London Flat #4 - Christmas Decorations
December in London is bleak. We wake up in the dark, and come home from work in the dark (or at least M does). Bookended in the middle of that darkness are gloriously sunny moments, but they are few and far between; otherwise, rain prevails.
Adding a little bit of light and sparkle to the flat is an obvious choice. But how much? We don't have much room, especially now that Little M's paraphernalia covers 90% of every surface.
Having just moved back home, I ventured into our mysterious, dusty attic to search for our Christmas ornaments. I was sure we'd stashed some before we left on our African adventures. After a lengthy search amongst old, zipperless suitcases, broken picture frames, and bags of clothes destined for the charity shop, I found our tiny crystal tree, a string of twinkle lights and a few baubles. Not much, but exactly enough to inject some light and cheer into our tiny flat.
It seems to me that the key to minimalist Christmas decorating is to put up those things which you love, which are beautiful, or which have special stories to tell. For example, the "Noel Santa" on the right hand side of the mantle-piece was given to me by a mosaicist named Mohammed who used to work with us on our archaeological digs in Tunisia. Whenever I look at the tiny pattern of pebbles making up the design I remember the hot, dusty summers spent sifting through Roman remains, the early morning calls to prayer from the mosques, and hot cups of mint tea shared with Mohammed and his family at the end of the day. The memories have nothing to do with Christmas, but that little ornament brings all that light and heat back into these cold, wet, December nights.
Perhaps as Christmas draws nearer I'll stop by the local florist on my way back from the coffee shop to buy some holly and mistletoe. I'll pop them into a vase and place them on our coffee table to add a little cheery green into the wintry atmosphere.
How do you decorate for Christmas? Elaborately? Simply? Why not share links to photos of your Christmassy home in the comments below?
Making my list...
... and checking it twice.
Some days I feel like little M and I are the best team in the world, and the two of us can accomplish whatever we set our minds to. Other days it feels like everything is unravelling and I'll never pick up a pencil again, or turn another page of a book, or fold another sock (not that I want to fold socks, but it has to be done, doesn't it?)
Today was a good day. I made a delivery of
to the Courtauld Gallery here in London for their Christmas displays while my mom watched little M. On my way home I popped by the post office to mail
It felt liberating to walk briskly through the snappy December air treading on the yellow leaves scattered on the sidewalk like golden coins.
Other days I can barely get out of bed or have a shower, as every waking moment is spent consoling my little inconsolable daughter. This is a big adjustment for everyone, including her. I imagine that from her perspective, life seems very overwhelming (it is for all of us, isn't it?). That's the thing about life; we don't choose life, it chooses us. We have to tense our legs and make the jump into the unknown whether we want to or not. We can't think about how far the drop might be, or where we'll land. We can only make the leap with the faith that everything will be ok. I'm telling that to little M every day... life is hard and overwhelming, but we're there for her every step of the way. She's survived the most difficult part, she made it here, now comes the fun of creating a wonderful, colourful, exuberant life. I can't wait to see how she shapes the world around her.
So that brings me to the last point on my list: enjoy Christmas. No matter what happens, or how difficult the day is with my little one, I'm determined to enjoy Christmas with every vibration in my soul. This is her first Christmas, and though she won't remember it, it is the beginning of a long chain of memories that we'll share together.
So with that in mind, I'm off to cuddle her and then sharpen a pencil and draw a few lines in my sketchbook.
What are your plans for the weekend?
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A little bit of gratitude
I usually try to make a list of all the things I'm thankful for on the second Monday in October, as that is when we celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada. However, life caught me by surprise (I'm not so fond of surprises, generally), and now I'm making my gratitude list in November, on American Thanksgiving. It's all the same really, when it comes out in the wash.
I'm sitting on my couch in the gloaming. I'm surrounded by wash-racks filled to overflowing with clean laundry languishing in the damp weather. Will the towels, flannels and baby-grows ever dry? Little M is curled up in her bouncy chair, chewing hard on a soother and fighting sleep.
Things are slowly starting to return to a new equilibrium. I cherish these stolen moments when I can spend a few minutes reading, writing, drawing or working on a project.
Here are a few things I'm grateful for right now:
1.
A minute; a second; a moment
in which I can take a deep breath and feel like myself again. Sharpen a pencil; turn the page of a book; open my mind to thoughts that are wider than these four walls and those 10 fingers.
2.
Those 10 fingers.
Darling little hands that are now learning to hang on tight to our fingers, or her favourite blanket.
3.
Starbucks
. I'm not generally a fan of big, chain coffee-shops, but our local Starbucks has become my new best friend. Not because of their coffee (which is still mediocre), but because they have loads of space inside to park our chariot of a stroller so baby and I can sit comfortably and not feel like we're in anyone's way.
4.
Three people whose names start with M.
You know who you are. You are the anchor around which I'm floating at the moment.
5.
Watching the leaves turn colour and gently float to the pavement.
Autumn is my favourite season. Everything about it feels so rich and layered. I especially love taking a turn around the Quiet Garden in Queens Park, where the caretakers are busily cleaning up the summer flower beds and planting their winters blooms (cyclamen, being a favourite).
6.
A new sketchbook.
And lots of blank pages waiting to be filled with new ideas.
7.
Online grocery deliveries.
I don't know what I'd do without it. We get our shopping delivered every Tuesday afternoon. I'm so relieved that I don't have to trek to the grocery store, push a shopping cart around the crowded aisles, and then haul the heavy bags home on the bus. Yesterday I told our delivery man that he needed to be quiet because my baby daughter was napping. He winked and obligingly whispered and tiptoed as he unloaded all the groceries.
Amazing
.
8.
Coffee table art books and exhibition catalogues.
I'm spending stolen moments pouring over the glossy pages of gorgeous illustrations and artwork. So much to inspire and nourish the soul.
9.
Naps.
All the parenting books say: when she sleeps, you sleep.
Amen
.
10.
The fact that I can be grateful.
Sometimes life can seem pretty fuzzy, and it's hard to focus and see all the small blessings abounding. But they're there, if you only look for them!
What are you grateful for today? This moment?
Long Fingers...
Welcoming Baby
Just over a week ago we welcomed our precious little daughter into the world.
She has a head of thick dark, almost reddish hair, curious eyes, and the longest fingers I've ever seen on a newborn. (In that, she takes after her mom). After a very long, difficult pregnancy, I'm so relieved to finally be holding her in my arms and resting at home.
Right now I'm sitting on the couch and catching a few minutes of peace before I have to wake her for her next feeding. She's swaddled warmly in her bouncy chair in the corner of the room. It's so quiet that I almost forget she's there until I hear one of her squeaky stretches or whiffling snores.
Now that a week has passed, I'm trying to figure out how to get back into some sort of creative routine. If I'm not drawing, painting or writing, I feel like a shadow of myself. Once I've recovered from the birth, I want to start a sketchbook for pleasure; I want to fill it with drawings of my little daughter, and all the other joyful things I see daily.
I'm in the process of writing a list of (small and achievable) goals for the next few months. Blogging is definitely a priority, as is writing and drawing for pleasure (not for a deadline), playing piano (which I neglected sorely when I was pregnant), and going for walks in our nearby parks.
But right now, the most important thing is that in 20 minutes I'll wake my little darling and gaze into her eyes as she breastfeeds. Every facet of these quiet moments shines with perfection; I want to save them like jewels, and wear them forever near my heart so that I will always remember her as this quiet, sweet, cuddly little babe.
For those of you who have had babies, what were your best coping mechanisms for the first few months?